Courtesy Universal Music Group
Much has been said about Nick Jonas‘ love life. His romantic escapades haven’t exactly gone down in secrecy. The world fully remembers those infamous purity rings that bookmarked the early Jonas Brothers days, after all.
And after that little symbol was cast aside, his fans got to watch enthusiastically as his love life played out for all to see: Dating the former Miss USA, Miley Cyrus (and spawning that jam “7 Things”) and Selena Gomez, doing whatever it is he was doing with Kate Hudson. It’s all fascinating, but with all the speculating we’ve yet to hear much straight from Jonas himself. The singer loves to deflect (and can you blame him?), and the result is a whole lot of romantic mystery.
Just yesterday E! News visited Jonas exclusively as he surprised fans at the listening session for the Target edition of his new album, and the “Levels” singer played it coy when asked about his girlfriend prospects. “I don’t know if I’m really looking for a new relationship at the moment,” he said. “I’ve been so busy there’s been literally zero time but at this point I’m just focusing ahead.”
But even with that, there is one place where we’ve been able to hear directly from Nick: His music. The guy does not hold back when it comes to his lyrical outpouring of emotions, and today’s release of the brand new Last Year Was Complicated was no different. The second the album dropped we dove right through every song, listening not for the beats and the high notes, but for every romantic reference we could cull.
And cull we did. There are plenty of gems that hint at what goes on behind the scenes in the love life of Nick Jonas, and we’ve got all those lessons right here.
The Line: If this is what you call love/ I think I’m better alone/ I feel your claws sinkin’ in/ Gettin’ under my skin like voodoo — “Voodoo”
The Lesson: Nick is a sucker for stage five clingers and he’s not a fan.
The Line: I got a bottle, I’ve been saving it/ I thought we’d drink it on that day/ We were the opposite of breaking up/ I can’t believe I’m losing you/ We just opened up too soon — “Champagne Problems”
The Lesson: He once planned to propose to an ex-girlfriend—or at least daydreamed about proposing to an ex-girlfriend.
The Line: Cause if I want you, then I want you, babe/ Ain’t going backwards, won’t ask for space/ Cause space was just a word made up by someone who’s afraid to get to close —”Close”
The Lesson: When Nick Jonas goes in, he goes all in. Once he commits you will literally never be rid of him.
The Line: When I get home, TV on/ Drink in my glass, better make it strong/ Some nights wanna fill this space/ A tight dress and a pretty face — “Chainsaw”
The Lesson: Sometimes a man gets lonely with the daily grind. And sometimes that man just wants some company from a nice lady. And sometimes that man is Nick Jonas. Not that he’d every say he’s lonely, of course.
The Line: We’ll go crazy/ In the bedroom babe/ But that ain’t all I’m into/ I wanna get inside your brain — “Touch”
The Lesson: He’s a talker! Unless brain doesn’t actually mean brain, but we’d prefer to entertain the notion that he just wants to get to know a girl first.
The Line: The one thing I love more than being with you/ And that’s late nights, doing what I do/ I got sleep eyes; I woke up like this/ Feel like aw, s–t, throw some bacon on it — “Bacon”
The Lesson: After a long night at the studio, Nick Jonas likes to wake up and fry some bacon for breakfast. It may not have much to do with his love life, but it’s a pretty essential piece of knowledge for anyone looking to enter into a relationship with him.
The Line: I’m afraid to find out that I’m right for you/ Cause it’s one step closer to life with you — “Unhinged“
The Lesson: We smell a commitment-phobe!
The Line: When did all these good girls decide to go bad? You know I love your skin, but is it deeper than that? Don’t wanna blame you for it, cause that’s what we ask of you — “Good Girls“
The Lesson: Nick doesn’t agree with the “less is more” school of thought when it comes to clothes. Either that or he does believe in it and he now feels guilty.
The Line: I need you to trust me — “Don’t Make Me Choose”
The Lesson: He wants to be trusted.
The Line: I was so foolish/ On some stupid s–t/ Should have never let you out/ Knowing that you left/ Messes with my head/ Shadows of you haunt me now — “Under You“
The Lesson: Nick can’t stop thinking about the one that got away. We can’t be certain who he’s referring to here, but the timing of the album certainly points to a certain Miss USA.
The Line: I’ll be the first to admit that I’m hard to please — “Unhinged“
The Lesson: He’s really hard to please. Sexually? Intellectually? When cooking bacon the appropriate amount? The world may never know for sure.
The Line: I’m just tryna kick it with the girl in the back/ Who doesn’t give a damn — “Comfortable“
The Lesson: There’s high maintenance, there’s low maintenance, and then there’s no maintenance. The latter is right up his alley.
The Line: Never met a beauty queen I didn’t like — “Comfortable”
The Lesson: Nick Jonas officially has a type.
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